A quick post while she's away

Katie is asleep while I'm watching the boys this a.m., at Grandma Sheryl's. I decided to post 2 quick movies while breakfast is going on around me. The first is from last week in Minnesota, where we got a visit from the Nowatzkis: Paul, Courtney, Victor (age 4) and Henry (age 2). Finn and Henry really enjoyed my parents' pinball machine. Although Finn was quite good at shooting the ball out with the plunger, the finer points of using the flippers was of course lost on him. Note the unusual location of the ball at the very end. :)

Pinball Wizards from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

As we've discussed, Graham is a pretty happy baby. He is prone to fun little giggles and shrieks of amusement. Yesterday when Josh, Amy, and Greta (age 1) Raulerson came by, there was something about Josh that finally made Graham go into full-on laughing! It was sooo cute, and we got some on video. Also, he is 3 months old now.

Laughing Graham from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

I like when Greta (and especially Finn) came by to insert themselves into the action.

Let it snow!

Ohmygosh, where to start! Well, we spent the 20-26th in Minnesota, visiting my family. My parents were glad to see our little boys, and my sister Jeanna, brother Justin (and his family) were all there. Yay! Finn had a fantastic blast of a time, and everyone marveled, as they should, at what a good baby Graham is. He goes to sleep easy. He's a good eater. He's generally just very jolly.

Finn did not mind the cold (which was not at all severe by non-wimp standards: highs in the low 30s). If you consider that "really cold," please don't tell me. Here is Finn out helping grandpa shovel the driveway. This picture gives the impression that he is actually doing a good job, but that can't possibly be the case. Maybe I did that and handed him the shovel. Hm.

Here he is on the deck, which he liked because the snow was much less deep than in the yard. On day-one, deep snow meant "Uppa! Uppa! Uppa!"

Finn and his 3-year-old cousin Jamie had a fantastic time playing together. This trunk was great for sitting in, once one got the pesky linens out of it.

Finn was a BIG BIG fan of opening "preh-nents" and fell down the stairs into grandma Mary's arms on Christmas day, when it finally was time to open the presents under the tree.

Graham was quite jolly during the proceedings and liked his presents, which Finn was glad to open for him.

The big outdoor event on Christmas day was the making of a snowman. I noticed that the temperature had jumped up to 34 degrees, meaning it was perfect snowman weather. The bottom was the biggest snowball I could push. The middle was the biggest I could lift, and the head was roughly proportional. Finn found the last part we put on top. It almost looks like a feather. The eyes are little rotten tree fruit. The nose is a venison meat stick that Justin made at his house. The mouth is evergreens from a bush. It think it turned out pretty well! And what did Finn name the snowman? Leather. Yes, Leather. Why not?

On to Iowa!

The thing about Los Gatos...

...is that it is fancy. Can you find what is unusual about our local supermarket ad?

Oh right! It's the $85 bottle of wine next to the $1.79 bottle of apple juice!

Another great thing around here is the Christmas lights in Vasona County Park. They are lit up every night for 5-6 weeks. It is a mile or two of lights, so you drive along very slowly in your car. Although much of it is Christmas themed, the highlight I think is the dinosaurs, complete with sound effects. Finn was a big fan. Katie captured them on video.

Dino Xmas from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

This morning we opened presents, since tomorrow REALLY early we'll be heading back to the Midwest. From Santa, Finn got exactly what he'd been asking for: "Own screwdriver." Actually, he got two and a bunch of other fairly realistic tools and a toolbox.

Finn also got push-broom sweeper and the boys got a big wooden train set, to "share." Here is a photo from the morning that Finn took after I aimed the camera for him.

O Father, Where Art Thou?

Jonathan is in Texas - Texas! This is his first trip since Graham was born, and I've been pretty afraid of it, but I got the boys to school this morning more or less on time, and got both of them through their bath and bed routine two nights in a row, so the hard parts are over. I even did a load of diaper laundry and a load of dishes.

On the other hand, I got less than 6 hours sleep last night (thanks, Graham, for choosing that night to decide to get up twice as often). The baths weren't much more than a quick rinse. Finn has only asked for Daddy once, but has been extra whiny and clingy, and today we got our first ever report of hitting at school. And last night Finn pretended to pee on the kitchen floor on his way from his bath to his bedroom, and tonight he actually did. ("pee! pee!") So there we go. Hurry home, Jonathan! Tomorrow afternoon can't get here fast enough.



As with every time Jonathan travels, I'm in awe of those of you who do this solo parenting thing for more than a few days a year. Yikes.

The 2X issue

One of the things I was worried about before Graham was born was how insane our life would get with two kids instead of one. I'd heard that life gets 2^2 times harder (i.e., 4 times) with two kids. That didn't seem to make any sense to me, because we had already greatly adjusted of life when Finn came along, and I couldn't see how we would have to make as dramatic a change (or more) for kid #2.

Well, at this point, I would say it is not nearly 4 times as hard. I think it isn't even 2 times (2^1) as hard. I'd say it's somewhere in between 2^(1/2) and 2^(1/sqrt(2)), which is 1.4 and 1.6, as you know. [I had to work twos in there somehow.] I mean, yeah, we have to get up a little earlier in the morning, and yeah, he wakes up at night 1-2 (sometimes 3) times, so we're getting a bit less sleep (especially Katie). But I think life is pretty similar to before. There is a certain amount of interference to run on Finn to make sure he doesn't lay on top of Graham, but if Graham wasn't there we'd still have to keep him from breaking something else.

I think it probably makes a difference as to when the "hard" kid comes. Graham is pretty laid back and jolly, so it doesn't take an incredible amount of effort to keep him happy. Also, Finn was sick from ages 3-6 months, which kept him from sleeping well, so hopefully that will not hit Graham.

Onto the cuteness: I'm blatantly stealing this pic from Katie. It shows Finn's incredibly cute frog rain gear. The photo somehow gives the feeling of ultra-preparedness. Like Finn is ready to take on anything, plus protect his little brother.

Both boys like the bed in Finn's room. Soon we'll have to start calling it Finn and Graham's room. I wonder how that will go over....

Merry Chrippett!

We got our Christmas tree last Saturday. We went to the tree lot that's a fundraiser for the boys' day care, and picked out the shortest one they had, about five feet tall. Here's Finn checking out some of its bigger brothers. He was a big help with the decorating, as you might imagine.
Finn is very excited about all things Christmas - Rudolph, both the show and the song, Christmas trees, Santa (at least in theory, see below), and even his advent calendar. It's a paper one that matches an Eric Carle book we have. I wasn't sure if he'd find it interesting, but he's very excited to open a new door every morning, and will sometimes stand and look at it for ages, theorizing about what might be behind the different doors. The 25th, he has decided, is a pig.
My office's children's holiday party was Friday night, and Finn got to see Santa. He was very excited about it, so long as Santa kept his distance. Trying to put him on Santa's lap was met with terrified screaming, just like last year. We didn't get pictures of that this year - I forgot to charge the camera battery, and the light was kind of dim in there anyway, but I might score some from someone else at the office later. In the meantime, here's one of Graham's turn with Santa, with Finn edging as close as he dared.

Next up, for you grandparents and other Fortney-boy-antic-addicts, are two videos, both taken the other night while Finn ate dinner and we waited for Jonathan to get home from work. First is Graham playing his favorite game: kick off the blanket. Finn was also a fan at this age.

Graham kicks off the blanket from Katie on Vimeo.
Next up, here I am making Finn giggle, just because I can.

Making Finn giggle from Katie on Vimeo.
And finally, here's the "classic Finn" imp look, finally captured on film.
I'm updating Flickr tonight with October and November. Hopefully tomorrow I'll get the rest of the way caught up.

Brother Bathtime Bonanza!

It's beginning to become apparent to us that Graham may be a bit more even keeled than Finn. He is often content to just sit or lay down and kick around. He is quick to smile and coo. He isn't too phased things like being plunked down in the bathtub next to his brother...

As part of Finn's bathtime routine, he's in the bath from about 6:30 til 6:45, before stories and bedtime. We've been doing this for a long time, and he likes it. I'm not saying that we always get him particularly clean, but it's what we do. We've been thinking of getting Graham into the bathtime mix, since he's now two months old and we're trying to establish a routine for him. Katie found him this great chair on amazon, and it came today so we tried it out! It was GREAT! He and Finn both loved it. And tonight both boys were asleep at 7:15!

If you're interested in learning "The Fortney Way" to baby bedtimes, you can fly us out to see you! We like free trips to visit family and friends. So think about it. There are some downsides to "The Fortney Way" of child rearing. They may include, for instance, one black eye per child per year, your wet child wildly shouting "Nakey Boy!" while he runs around the house after bath, and a lot of poop to be personally dealt with from the cloth diapers. Just let us know when you want us to visit. :)


(Do the Borat fans out there like the photo edit?)

Cousin Jessica Fortney is in town for a visit (mostly with cousins Alan and Margaret in Mountain View) and we all headed down to the Monterey Bay Aquarium today. Finn was tired and hungry, but did enjoy the touch pools, sharks, and the octopus. The visit ended when Finn switched from talking about octopuses to macaroni. Then it was time for lunch.

2 year & 2 month doctor visit

It was a full day here yesterday: the boys had back to back doctor's appointments for their 2 year and 2 month checkups. Both are doing fine, and I finally had enough stats to make a cool chart (Graham is red/orange/yellow, Finn is green/blue/purple):

It's a little misleading because Finn was 10 weeks old at his 2 month appointment, and Graham was only 8.5, but you get the general idea. The most interesting tidbit is that while Finn's head size was always in the 70-85th percentile, Graham's is more like 30. So no giant noggin for him, although he is trying to make up for it in overall head mass by adding on the chins.
After seeing Dr. Lee we checked out the new Sunnyvale Target, where they have carts that seat 3 kids. Finn was very excited to ride in the "trailer," as he called it.

And then before Jonathan headed in to work we squeezed in a pre-Thanksgiving haircut for Finn. This was the first time he sat on one of the chairs (well, horse) by himself rather than in his Daddy's lap, so that was exciting.

And here's a video of Graham from about 10 days ago in what seems to be his favorite spot in the universe: his changing pad. Last week I just left him there while I went and showered and got dressed, and he was still having a great time when I came back.

Graham on the changing pad from Katie on Vimeo.
Monday Graham started at day care, and seemed to enjoy it - he was grinning and watching a mobile when we came to pick him up. We thought Finn would be super excited to have Graham come to "school" with him, but so far it hasn't made much of an impression.
Things are almost kinda sorta starting to calm down around here (I still need to log 50 or so internship hours by the end of the semester), so hopefully I'll get Flickr updated soon. Happy Thanksgiving!

Finn's birthday party, and CHUB!

Hi there! Well, I got my National Science Foundation proposal done. Katie got her giant Masters degree project done. We also had Finn's birthday party! It was at a local park with lots of playground equipment. We had a good mixed crowd of kids and grownups. We had a good mixed crowd of muffins and cupcakes from Icing on the Cake, as well!

There was a dinosaur theme, that extended from plates to balloons, to these cool triceratops masks, below. (Finn with Caitlyn, age 3.) When we mention his birthday now, he'll still say "Friday!" even though it was a couple Fridays ago.

In other news, it was my 33rd birthday on the 17th. Many thanks for cousin Margaret for coming over to let Katie and me got out to dinner to celebrate last Monday. Getting out is so, so, so, so, so important. It was only for a few hours, but so fun. :)
So we also have the other boy, Graham, who still doesn't walk OR talk! Sheesh! But he is REAL cute, and it putting on the chubs at a breakneck pace. He only slows down the eating a little at night. He's been up 3 times a night lately. He loves to lay on his changing pad. I think that is his favorite place beside on his momma. The best part about Graham is that if you smile real big at him he'll smile big right back.

Apple Dirt Day Finn!

Happy Birthday! Finn is 2 today! Yay! Here he is with his present from Katie and me, which he got last week---a strider bike! He's getting better at it already. The point is that you learn how to balance first, and then later on, after you've mastered that, then you learn how to pedal. Probably the pedal bike will come in another year, if he makes good progress. I saw him coast with his feet off the ground for about 6-8 feet yesterday, so it's going well. "Bike ridin'!" "Bike-ul, bike-ul!"

Bike ridin'! from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

Although he doesn't really know what his birthday is, he is excited, and can yell about it really loudly, if the need arises. Below is one of his presents from Grandma Sheryl. Now he can help around the kitchen (he's good at "dumpin'" ingredients in) and look good too.



A quick movie I took of family dinnertime from last week:

Dinnertime from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

Halloween, revisited

We've been going through some life the past couple of weeks, so sorry for not getting around to posting. Katie is working on finishing her Master's degree portfolio and I'm writing up a proposal to the National Science Foundation. (I need to convince them to give me $300K of your money. No, it doesn't go into my pocket.) Both are due on Monday. So there has been a lot of Graham juggling during the days, and non-stop work after both boys go to bed. It has been a team effort!

I thought that I'd give a summary rundown of trick or treating back a few weeks ago. Firstly, Finn would only say "Tricker," and that was just at home. The thing he said best out on the streets was "Next house!" I was interesting to see what was going on through his eyes. Very bewildering but not too frightening. For instance there was the 5-foot giant chicken that stopped him dead in his tracks:

Sometimes Finn would try to reach in and give candy to people who were giving him candy, like a trade. The neighborhood that we visited was a few streets down from us. They go ALL OUT. Pretty much every house had substantial decorations, and there were kids and parents everywhere. The road was closed off to traffic.

It had always annoyed me that in E.T. the kids went out trick or treating BEFORE it was dark out. Who does that?! Well, it is interesting that Finn is basically never outside when it is dark. He goes to bed and 7 p.m. and by the time he goes outside in the morning, it is light out. He just doesn't do darkness. So of course we had to get an early start on trick or treating, since he goes to bed so early. Even so, at 5:45, when we started, there were a fair number of kids. It was definitely more crowded at dusk at 6:45, which was a good sign for non-lameness of California children and parents. As he gets older, I'm firmly committed to him actually going trick or treating when it is dark out. Because to do otherwise (except when you're not even 2, is well, lame.)

My lasting memory of our outing was the large amounts of alcohol consumed by the adults. We saw parents leading their kids while drinking bottles of beer and to-go cups of wine. Many people answered their door holding glasses of wine. One woman in front of us in line for candy said, "I brought the cosmos!" to her neighbor. Another house had the grill going and a keg. So the adults succeeding in having a good time as well. We didn't partake....but there is always next year. :)

Graham smiles, and Finn talks A LOT.

Hey everybody!
My portfolio is due in less than two weeks, so I've been a bit too panicky to blog. I'm getting close, though, so I thought I'd take a moment to post a couple videos.
First, here's proof that Graham can smile, a movie taken about a week after the first smile, which was at about the 4 week mark.

First (week of) smiles from Katie on Vimeo.
And some photos Jonathan took at dinner tonight - looks like we may have another goofball in the family. (FYI, pumpkin bibs are still totally appropriate until at least Thanksgiving.)
And finally, a video of some of the other stuff he's up to these days - waving his limbs around, turning his head to look at sounds, and following objects around with his eyes. Also, being cute.

Graham kickin' around from Katie on Vimeo.
In Finn news, trick-or-treating was a good time (more photos soon, hopefully), and he's better at talking every day. The words are clearer, there's an astounding number of them, and the other night he busted out with a real sentence: "Read it again please," (or "Read it. Gen. Please." if you want to be picky) rather than his usual "READit! READit! READit!"
Tonight he helped me make pumpkin cookies. I measured out ingredients and he was in charge of "dumpin" them into the mixing bowl. Also slamming down the top part of the stand mixer, and occasionally turning it on. He later ate half a cookie, which I suppose means I'm responsible for the other two dozen. Here he is in the Safeway parking lot on Sunday, excited to be posing with the moon.

Code Yellow

Hi all! We'll start out with an short movie of Graham, featuring some incredible cinematography on my part. I'm an ace with that camera. Graham is doing well, but last night was terrible, as he woke up about 7 times, for no reason. Earlier in the week he had two 6-hour stretches, so we'll see. He's getting cuter as he fattens himself up.

Head Bob from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

For Finn, this is a time of big changes. In addition to gaining a brother, and starting to use two- and three-word phrases, he's moved from the toddler room to the youngest preschool room, the "yellow room," at daycare. (He's there MWF, and Graham starts in 3 weeks.) He likes it a lot, and likes being an older kid. He's even been sitting on the potty at school, and occasionally at home, with some promising results. It is mostly on his own initiative.

For Halloween this year Finn will be a Space Man. I got him the costume at Kennedy Space Center in March. We went to his daycare today (Peppertree Schools of Los Gatos) for the costume parade and lunch. He bolted the walking parade after 30 seconds and just went around on a trike, which he propels by walking. The third photo down is his class eating lunch. So cute!



We also carved our pumpkin! He even helped swiffer up the mess. Look at how little he was last year! Tonight we were going through a book about the alphabet, and we were discussing O vs. Q. The Q is like the O, but with a tail, I told him. His reply: "Neighbors." (Did what?) "Took it." (Took what?) "Tail." So now we know why the O is not a Q. Those neighbors! For whatever reason, he talks about NEIGHBORS all the time.

And YES, we will go trick or treating!

Firsts and Photos

I don't have anything really profound to say about how things are going around here. Things are going well. We have a pretty good routine at night since Graham tends to wake up after 3 hours for more eats. Between 9/10 p.m. and 6 a.m. we sleep 7-8 hours, so we're doing pretty well. It'll be nice when he sleeps longer, but this is very doable. Finn woke up early last night yelling "Linon! Linon! Linon!" It appears that he dropped his little plastic lion while sleeping, which woke him up. We've learned to NOT go in there, almost no matter what, because it just make things worse. After 5-10 minutes of yelling for Linon, Mommy, and Daddy, he went back to bed. If you go in there, he can keep you up for an hour for stories and milk.

Finn got a fantastic rain outfit that I'm sure we'll show off at a later date. Here he is showing off his frog boots (with frog eyes) and his space pajamas from Grandma Mary and Grandpa John.

Here is the first bath that I gave Graham. It was maybe his third overall. It was successful, in that he got clean. He eventually settled down when I let him lean over forward, on my arm. Speaking of leaning over on my arm, see the next pic:

Graham is a good eater and is chubbing out nicely.

This is Graham's first bottle! He did OK, but bottle #2 was very successful. I'm VERY glad that both our boys have been so good at bottles. Makes life for Katie easier.

That picture above almost makes it look like I'm losing my hair. Good thing I know better.
It's fun to lay on the mat with your brother.

Its a bummer when your parents leave town

My parents came into town over the weekend for a quick few-day visit to see Mr. Teeny and Dr. Rambunctious. A good time was had by all! But now we're back to real life with only two of us to handle our two children. Watching Mad Men makes me jealous of the hired help. I guess I should be an advertising executive...but then I'd never get to see my boys. I'm still at home every day, but I'm going into work for the first time on Wednesday.
Here is a nice one of Grandma Mary and Graham, who is flashing a little smile of sorts.

Here is the whole family relaxing in our living room. Note Paula at the bottom right.

Graham is doing well these days, looking a bit older. He's working on neck strength as Katie's video shows. The focus is not great, but you get the idea.

Nexersises. from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

Finn is still very interested in Graham, and likes to be his buddy. He also likes to try to get up on your lap when you're holding Graham. It gets crowded and a little dangerous for the little guy. Here they are being cozy together.

Oh, What a Night

Graham turned two weeks old yesterday. We celebrated by attending the Ardenwood Harvest Festival with Jessica, Daren, Caitlin, and Liam (which Finn pronounces approximately "kitten" and "lemur"). While there, Graham got to go on his very first second ever train ride (apparently we go on a lot of trains).

And Finn got to climb hay bales and a big dirt pile, pick out a pumpkin, pet goats, and pick up sheep pellets (that last wasn't exactly on the program). More pictures of harvesty goodness are up at Flickr.

Then we came home and relaxed for the afternoon and looked forward to a good night's sleep, because Graham's started only getting us up twice a night. Unfortunately, Finn woke up around 3 with nightmares or something, and didn't go back to sleep until 4:30, and Graham projectile-spewed a whole feeding all over me at about 4:15. So we're hoping for a better night tonight.

In other news, Graham learned how to suck his thumb today, something Finn never got around to.

Just the four of us

My mom went back home yesterday. That was a little scary, and sad. It was way too easy to get used to having her here, and we'll miss her. But we got both boys to bed last night, got some sleep for ourselves, and got them both up - and Finn to day care - this morning. Today I'm going to concentrate on this whole "sleep when the baby sleeps" thing, because Graham is still eating an average of every two hours, which means I am TIRED. I'm recovering, slowly but surely, from the birth, and am glad Jonathan, my mom, Finn's day care, and this semester's relatively homework-free schedule are allowing me to take it easy. Both my brain and my body are operating at about 1/3 speed, if that.

Have you noticed that Graham is tiny? Obviously he's much smaller than his 32-pound brother, but he's also smaller than Finn ever was. You'd think a pound or so wouldn't make much difference, but he can wear things that Finn was too big for his first day home, like this awesome hat.And even though he never sleeps for very long, he's a little more agreeable about his sleeping conditions than Finn was at this age. Swaddling, for example, is optional, and seems to be on its way out.I think with all the "attention" he gets from Finn, he's going to be a pretty resilient kid. Combine that with Finn's extreme rough-and-tumble-ness, and we should be in for quite a time. In the meantime, he's pretty mellow. Here he is in an exciting 20-second hiccup clip.

Graham: Chilling, with Hiccups from Katie on Vimeo.

I updated Flickr last night, so there are more photos over there.

Graham and Finn Movies!

Well, we're all at home, and getting settled in nicely. Katie's mom flew in on Tuesday, and she is staying for a week. Having a third hand is incredibly nice, especially when one is taken up by Dr. Rambunctious and other by his small sidekick, Sleepy G. Newborns sleep "18 hours a day" but I think Graham prefers 20+ hours.

It has been really fun to see how Finn loves his little brother. He's sad to go to daycare, the mornings that he goes, and he says "Graham" on the way back home. The first video is just after Finn first met Graham at the hospital. Previously he knew that Graham was sleeping in Momma's tummy.

First meeting! from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

Here they are chilling together in living room:

Boys together at home from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

And here is Finn holding Graham for the first time, which is a movie that we took just today. He was ecstatic! He is mostly very gentle with him, when he's thinking about it. If he's not, he's liable to push on Graham or Katie when he wants to get up.

Brothers in Arms from Jonathan Fortney on Vimeo.

We went to Graham's first doctor appointment today. He's put on 4.5 ounces of weight since leaving the hospital, which Dr. Lee found impressive. But not ONE TENTH as impressed as Dr. Lee was about the perfect shape of Graham's head. That is "a thing" amongst pediatricians, apparently....

Graham's arrival

Graham Robert Fortney was born yesterday at 4:21 pm, weighing 7 lbs., 12 oz., 20 inches long. So far as we can tell, he's absolutely perfect (that's the right English translation for the pediatrician phrase "no issues I'm concerned with," right?) He's an excellent screamer, and when not too cold or too angry, a natural nurser. He has dark hair, blue eyes, and was born with super long ragged fingernails, which we're cautiously working on trimming. Those are the basics; play-by-play below.

Labor started just after 8 am yesterday (Sunday), with contractions mild and spread out enough that, based on my experience with Finn, I thought might or might not stick around. We tried a car ride, and a change of scenery, and they got more intense and never really spaced out. I called the friends we had afternoon plans with around 9 to cancel, secretly hoping we could still maybe meet them for the train ride up in Felton. Um, earth to Katie: no. Katie to Lauren: sorry for being a delusional kook.

We called our Finn-sitters (big thank you to Margaret and Alan, by the way. They kept Finn entertained and in his natural habitat all day while we were at the hospital, providing us with major peace of mind that was just invaluable. We even got to see pictures on Facebook of Finn eating spaghetti shortly after Graham was born.). Jonathan and Finn went grocery shopping. I called our midwife Bethany to let her know we'd probably be heading to the hospital sometime that day (by this time I was a little less in denial, but still thinking Monday was almost as likely as Sunday).

We met Bethany at the hospital sometime between 12 and 1; contractions were about 4 or 5 minutes apart. I was... not great, inside my head. We were still only at about 2 centimeters. The pain was mostly handleable, but I kept thinking about how this was the "easy part," and how much longer we had to go, and sometimes it was BAD. During Finn's labor I got to a point where I was never rested, the pain never left between contractions, all I cared about was making it stop (seriously - the phrase "the baby's doing fine" did not even register), and I was just a big ball of fear and freak-out. I remembered that place, and I did not want to go there, or even close. I know there are people who can look at that, and say "hey, that's just fear," and put it away. I'm not one of them, and I could see myself starting to be governed by fear of the fear, and I decided I needed a more concrete action plan. So I said to Bethany, "Can we talk about the epidural," and she said "we can talk about whatever you want." Which is such a nice answer, and why she's great.

I know we have friends on the "epidurals heck no" end of the spectrum and some on the "okay, labor's started, where's my epidural?" end. I'm neither. My last experience was mixed, and I guess my place on the spectrum was "let's avoid that if we can." That was when I was not yet in labor, thinking hey, I did 30 hours before, 15 should be nothing. When I was actually in labor, looking at 10 more hours (or so I thought) of contractions that I can't properly describe (because really, anyone who's been through labor, have you ever successfully explained what any of it feels like?), things looked different. Bethany asked if I could give her 2 more hours first, to get me to 4-5 cm. I said "heck yes, I can do 2 hours. I can't do 10." "It won't be 10." (Oh man, she was so right.)

So we did 2 hours, serious contractions, got the IV stub thing in so we'd have it later, spent some time in the tub, some time on the ball, and .... we were up to 2-3 centimeters. I don't know about you, but when someone is telling you "not to focus on the numbers," and that you're now "2 to 3" instead of "about 2," and you've had a kind of long day and you're a bit touchy because you've been IN FRICKING LABOR for about 7 hours, I personally suspect that those two measurements are essentially the same.

It was 3pm, or a bit after. I was thinking maybe 11pm if we were lucky. Spoiler: Graham was born at 4:21. Did I mention how I was only at "2 to 3" centimeters after 7 hours? For those of you not familiar with this process, did you know that the goal is 10 centimeters? Do some math, and you will realize why the rest of this story has kind of a garbled feeling. Time got ... mushy.

Bethany suggested breaking the bag of waters. We did that with Finn and he still took another 12 or so, so it didn't seem like a big deal. I did realize that it would make things more intense (yesterday afternoon's internal translation: so we get to the epidural sooner), but Bethany said we could have some fentanyl ready if it got TOO intense, so I put the scary place away again.

Bethany broke the bag. There were contractions. There was a defeated puppy dog look to Bethany, followed by fentanyl. Somewhere in there she checked me, and I was hoping we were close to 4 cm so we could start finding the anesthesiologist... and we were at 5-6 (surprise!) so he was called, and we waited, and I yelled. I was pretty much consumed with surviving the contractions, but I did register burning, and remembered that that was supposed to be important, so I duly reported it. After what seemed like an eternity (but was probably somewhere between 5 and 20 minutes), the epidural was in, and I was given the happy news that it would probably start to work in about 10 minutes. Too long, but hey, at least finite.

Unfortunately (fortunately?), speaking of 10, I was also now at 10 centimeters. And being told to push. I thought she was kidding at first, or meant something like I could push a bit if it would make me feel better, but no, she was serious, and about 3 contractions later (Jonathan estimates about 5 minutes), we had Graham. So the epidural was a helpful distraction, but otherwise not much of a pain management tool.

Same slow start, same happy ending, but otherwise a completely different experience than having Finn. And we're doing great, and the boys got to meet this morning, which was so incredibly fun. We head home from the hospital tomorrow, and my mom gets in tomorrow night. Here we go - wish us luck!

P.S. Thomas and Amy visited tonight, brought dinner, and took pictures.